Leading during this Pandemic

Many of us right now are at home, safe from COVID-19. Any news channel would probably be showing any updates with how many are infected, how many have passed away, and what is being done to stop this. When I first heard about the coronavirus, I didn't take it seriously. I don't think a lot of people did. The idea of a pandemic in 2020 seemed unreal. This started to feel more real to me as the rush for toilet paper started, and it felt weird seeing empty aisles. But I would just think how crazy people are buying toilet paper when COVID-19 affects your respiratory system, not your... well, you know what I mean. It started to hit me harder when my mother asked me to take a leave of absence from my job, just to be safe. That was a very hard decision at first because I didn't want to stop making money. I wanted to keep working now while school transitioned into online. I asked my Youth Leader about it and thought about the pros and cons of leaving my job temporarily. In my mind, the pros were that I would stay focused on school and spend more time with God. The cons were not being able to make money. After some thought, I figured that my faith, school, and my health was far more important than money. Note: I am thankful and blessed to be able to be off work thanks to my parents. I pray for those who need a job and have a family to maintain. After I took a leave of absence, I focused on school, and I did some projects I have been wanting to do. After a week, I was already wanting to go out, but I knew I had to stay at home. I was starting to feel like I was suffocating, home all day? All week? I had started to lose the notion of time. When I found out church was also going to be online, it was heartbreaking. My favorite place to go was also taking precautions. I miss my friends, my leaders, and my pastor... I missed my community. In a small period, I had to figure out how to get back into a routine, stay on top of school, be stronger in my faith, and be connected with people... Oh and to have more patience at home since I am now stuck 24/7 with my family. (This is more towards my brother because if you have siblings, you know that the struggle is REAL) You would think that being stuck at home means being well-rested, having time to do what you need to do, staying on top of the game. The reality of it is that I have been staying up every day till 12am, either doing homework or playing animal crossing. I wake up at 8:30am and start school or stay on my phone. I do my bible studies, do more school work, and I tend to eat a lot more often than I used to. Being disciplined has been a struggle. I think recently, I have been hitting my hardest lows. I have been studying for an exam, and I failed. I haven't seen my boyfriend in a while, and I miss him so much. I haven't seen any of my friends, family, cousins. I felt so lonely, and my grades going down did not help me feel any better. I've cried a lot and I miss the way things used to be. Now, what has been making things a little better for me? Being a part of a wonderful bible study group of strong women, and leading 7th-grade girls in their faith. I may not see their lovely faces in person, but I get to through Zoom. Having a community via the internet is definitely a blessing. I feel like I am not the only one going through these things. Leading 7th-grade girls has been one of the best decisions I have ever made in my life. They're much younger than me, but they remind me to do have fun and to trust the Lord. I notice how creative they can get with their time, how much they trust God and work with what they got. One of them during our bible study call was making balloon animals? Which is something I haven't seen since I was a kid. (I feel like the adults who read this might laugh at this because I'm 19 but oh well) Leading these 7th graders is something I now look forward too, it has given me a form of structure to my week. I focus a lot of my energy on them, I want them to remain true to themselves and to trust the Lord with all of their heart and soul. I made cute worksheets for our bible study, and I welcome their quirkiness and their infinite amounts of energy. I would have never thought that these girls would help me during this time. When I ask them at the end of our study, how can we apply this to our lives, they usually say prayer, or trying to reaching out to people. I love this, despite it being a very simple response to my question, it is true. Community and prayer are so important. I see it like this, Every individual in our community is like a leaf. We all have different stories, experiences, and personalities. When we pray as a community, we connect together, those are the branches which then connects us down to the trunk. We unite, and as we get further down, we are rooted by faith in the Lord. Together we stand strong, and we grow more in our faith. Even though right now, we are all going through this pandemic, we need to stay united and help one another. Despite the circumstances that we are in, God is the same before this pandemic, and he will remain the same after this. God does not change, His love never fails. Being a youth leader is a blessing, and I have learned so much from these girls from our zoom calls. If you are considering being a youth leader, I encourage it. It is the greatest blessing to be there alongside with these kiddos. Sincerely, Clarissa